“I was a mouth professor, but not a heart possessor. I believed mentally, because I was raised in the church, but I never had a heart change. I remember walking in my door and collapsed crying. I got racked with all of this conviction. I just knew I was going to hell. It was very surreal and super natural. I wasn’t saved, I was in the process. I knew the Lord was convicting me. I believe God was granting me repentance. The bible says in Acts 11:18, “God grants repentance unto life.” I cheated on my fiancé, who is now my wife by the Grace of God. I tried to sleep it off. When I woke up the sun was beaming on my eyeball. I heard in my spirit a really strong voice from the Lord that said, you need to confess to her what you did. I said to myself, 'I can’t do this.' The same voice that spoke to me minutes prior said, she will forgive you. That news rocked her. She actually gave me something that I had never had, complete and total silence for three days straight. I was so afraid she was going to leave me. We were sitting on a bench; she was not talking to me. I looked right at Mount Tamalpais and yelled, ‘God forgive me.’ I was pleading with her to forgive me, crying in front of people, I did not care. I became like David, undignified. God was faithful to me in my endeavor. My advice to the non-believer is to repent or perish. Understand that He wants a relationship with you and that Jesus wants to defeat the powers of the devil in your life. Jesus came to destroy the works of the devil. After sixteen years of being a Christian, I have one word to the believer, “intimacy.” It’s the only thing that will cause you to grow in your walk. When your intimate with the Father, the Son, and in communion with the Holy Spirit, your being made Holy, without you even trying. Intimacy with Jesus will give you hope, security, purpose, direction, and confidence. Or as some say, “Godfidence.” Without intimacy with the Lord, you’re working in vain. “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.” 2 Timothy 3:16-17. “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom;” Colossians 3:16. My name is Kris and I surrender.”
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